Tuesday, May 5, 2009

My Green Thumb- Josiah

I really, really, really love what Mom calls our "science lesson" this month. She calls it planting and gardening, I call it making a big mess out of dirt without getting into trouble.

We've never really had much dirt for me to dig in. Mom and Dad say they both really don't like yard work, so they purposely chose a house with a small, simple yard "that backs to open space so we can see nature without being responsible for it." I don't really know what all that means, but it basically sounds like my Mom and Dad are too lazy to provide for me something that is fun. Typical.

But Mom's kinda gotten into this educational kick lately (something about TV frying my brain and maybe if I spend some time outside she will stop finding Legos in the air vents...) So she came up with the idea that if I plant seeds, she could try to teach me about roots and stems. And phloem, xylem, sclerenchyma and photosynthesis... yeah, I was listening, but don't tell Mom, it might go to her head. So Mom went out and bought some seeds, dirt and pots. And Grandma bought Gabby and I each some gloves, kneeling pads, trowells, cultivators and watering cans that all match with Diego on them for me and Dora on them for Gabby- because Grandma knows what is important.

Planting the seeds was pretty fun- Mom decided we would plant seeds in the house first, to germinate. (She likes to use big words like that, but it basically means you put them in little dirt boxes until they do something other than sit there like the piles of dirt that they are.) It has been pretty fun, because I get to stand on a kitchen chair and water all the seeds, but Gabby usually gets strapped into her eating chair first. This makes her mad, but it's her own fault for constantly trying to eat the dirt. Anyhow, if didn't take long for some of the flowers to sprout, which is good for me because I was seriously starting to wonder if Mom knew what she was doing at all.

So today, Mom said it was time to move those "flowers" outside. I should really clarify this. Mom keeps telling me that these are flowers and she shows me this picture on some packet and says things like, "See, these are going to be tall and blue, and these over here are going to be yellow..." You know, for someone who was so adamant that I learn my colors, it seems she should take her own advice- those things are green. I kept telling her over and over they are green, but she just doesn't get it sometimes...

So I followed Mom outside and you know what she did next- she made a HUGE mess! It was awesome! I've never seen my Mom do things like this! I mean, she tends to ignore dirt in our house until she thinks "someone is going to call CPS and we'll deserve it..." But she NEVER goes out and just starts making massive, disgusting, beautiful messes. Today, she was a vision in mud. She was tearing out grass and throwing it over the fence. AND SHE TOLD GABBY AND ME THAT WE COULD, TOO!! (There was a little drama with her trying to tell Gabby which grass to pull up that ended up with Gabby screaming and running away and Mom muttering about how Dad is going to kill her for letting us ruin the grass he just planted... but she didn't stop us, so I'm guessing it wasn't that big a deal...) Mom's pants got all muddy, and she kept crawling in all the grass Gabby was watering which just made her more muddy. She had dirt in her hair, and on her face and under her fingernails- and she didn't even rush in and throw herself in the bathtub, like she always does to me when I try to come in the house looking like that.

Now, I'm not stupid. I know that this kind of chance does not come up often- it might even be once in a lifetime. So I went with it, man! I started pulling up grass and dirt and throwing it as far as I could! Sure, sometimes it didn't really make it over the fence, and once it even hit Mom full in the eye. But she seemed to be too numb with whatever she was doing, she barely noticed. Then Mom started to let me water what she was planting with her watering can, and even let Gabby help, too! What, is it Christmas?! Gabby and I took that to mean we needed to help Mom water everything. We kept walking about 10 feet away and watering the same spot of grass over and over and over again. Then we would go back to where Mom was working and ask for more water. Eventually Mom wised up and went and got a big ol' pitcher from the kitchen so she could fill our cans up endlessly.

I don't know what got into Mom today, but I like it! I really did learn a lot about science. I learned how to make the perfect kind of mud- not too wet, not too dry, will stick to everything, but dry quickly so it's hard to get out of clothes. I learned how to find worms and stick them in my sister's hair. I learned that if you hit a cat with a clump of muddy grass, she runs away and may even bonk right into the fence if you catch her off guard. Mom was right- gardening is very educational. And the voodoo effect it has on my Mom isn't too bad, either...

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