Art- Gabrielle

My Mom has no taste.

I know that's horrible to say about someone, but seriously, this woman is so uncultured. I'm realizing that she might be beyond hope in this, too, because she's just not catching on.

See, my Mom likes to do these "craft" things. Usually it's things like making pictures for someone's birthday or thank you cards or presents for adults that are supposed to think we're cute. Other times, though, I suspect she gets out the stickers and crayons just to keep me out of the cat food or the kitchen cabinets or the bathroom sink. But I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt and trust that she is actually trying to encourage me to express myself artistically.

But here's the thing- she has all these rules! Like "Don't put glitter glue on the back of the paper or it will stick to the table," and "Don't put your stickers in the stamp ink before you put them on your picture." She thinks telling me "Crayons won't work on the foam paper" is going to really matter to me, because you know I'm smarter than she is and I can make it work if I really want it to. She doesn't want me to color my face, my hair, my clothes, my brother... If this isn't censorship, I don't know what is.

And the worst part- her home decorating. I mean, the woman has been working on painting the house since I've been born. And you know what? She paints an entire wall without a single line, scribble or smear of color. What is that taupe nonsense? Seriously, there are hundreds of square feet of walls in our house that are the same colors! I decided maybe she is just tired and busy and overwhelmed with everything she never gets to on any given day (or, at least, that's what I hear her whining about week in and week out...) So I'm going to help her. I've started adding some art work to our walls. I started small, in little places she couldn't see, like the wall space under my crib. After I'd been working on that for a while, I tried out a small space in the living room, to see what she'd say. She SAID we shouldn't color on the walls, but then she didn't clean it up right away, and showed it to both Grandma and Dad when they got home. So I decided she secretly really liked it and was hoping I'd do more.

Well, turns out, she just feels threatened by my superior taste. I think she's embarrassed that I, at just two years old, have already grasped the importance of making your home warm and homey and comforting. That people like to see self-expression and abstraction in a home-made gift. That the educational workbooks and crafts are giving guidelines on how to draw a circle or square. These are for the unimaginative- they really do intend for you to practice on the couch and table. At least, that's the conclusion I've come to with all the thinking time I've had while spending time alone in my room.